Being Your Authentic Self
16th Mar 23
How easy is it for you to be your authentic self?
Sometimes the root cause of your unhappiness is trying to be someone else.
You want to fit in, please others, be part of a group. You can do this in how you choose to dress, which hobbies to take up, material objects you aspire to own. Plus, many other ways.
Authentic Self and Relationship Choice
In a relationship you more than ever need to present your authentic self. If this is not the case, it can often lead to a hidden agenda, that can later on surface and reveal a big difference between a couple. So, when you choose your partner, you need to present a real persona that truly belongs to you.
Recognise when you are choosing just to please the other person, or when you are not choosing what you would choose if yours was the only decision.
We do need to compromise and share others’ ideas on occasions. We are all individuals with our own preferences after all. However, group choice does involve a bit of adjustment.
Social media can play a big part in sharing what we should look and act like. Our next generation need to be guided into learning that they need to become their own person.
I can look back on my life and identify areas where I have not been my authentic self. Through my involvement with learning skills and tools to aid Wellbeing, I am beginning to make a change in myself.
I was always known as the ‘quiet’ one in the corner with not much to say. It was often pointed out at family gatherings. But as a child, I felt I had nothing to offer in the way of joining in a conversation. I was actually happy inside just listening, but the external expectation of my inclusion, made me very uncomfortable.
Looking back through my school life I think that feeling of under confidence grew with me. I tried to settle in the middle of the ‘swats’ as they were then known and the disrupters. I was trying to please both groups.
Fast forward to a mother and a wife, and I think I slowly started to emerge as the person I was inside. However, the marriage broke down after 29 years. Mainly because I had been allowing the other person to call the shots so to speak. Despite my ‘nice’ efforts to change the balance, I failed and chose to move on.
Authentic Self and Self-Care
This is my example of how I felt until these later years of my life, by focussing more on my needs and allowing my authentic self to emerge, Angela had finally surfaced.
So, the purpose of this article is to hopefully draw your attention to how we are failing ourselves. If you don’t consider whether you are being your authentic self. You are depriving yourself and those around you of your unique, individual character.
So, I urge you to start today. Take a look at how you view yourself. Are you complying to meet other’s needs?
Think about whether you worry about what others think of your clothes, how you dress and other areas of your life and try maybe to change an area at a time.
When you meet new people try to remember to just be yourself. After years of adapting and shaping yourself and your life a certain way, it takes some time and effort to bring about change.
Each and every day is a new opportunity to grow. Get to know you, how you view yourself and the world around you. You will find it very liberating – become your True Authentic Self.
If you enjoyed my article please check out some of my other posts
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